I've been sitting in a space of 'nothingness' for quite some time now. Whilst so many belief systems and structures that I had built up in my mind and in my life, have fallen down around me, and continue to do so to this day, the 'nothingness' has, as I've previously mentioned in my Facebook posts, left a wide open space for 'newness' to enter.
Back in June, I went through a period of what I thought was mild-depression, but in hindsight, I can see now, that it was actually grief. Due to loss. As so many things I thought were true, and were real for me, came crumbling down. And what I thought my future would look like, will not, and is not coming to pass.
On top of this, as a sensitive soul, who's intuition is highly developed, and an energy field that has been cleaned up extensively, I've been sitting in dis-belief as my imagination, ideas, and flow of creativity have come to a halt. Not only have I been sitting in 'nothingness' but NOTHING has been coming to me! No thoughts, no ideas, no feelings... NOTHING!
This has had me stumped for over a month now. As being so sensitive, creative, and fast-thinking, my life has always been FULL of this stuff, constantly moving and grooving within me, internally. So coming to a stop, an end, a halt, has been a big shock!
And honestly? The only constant question in my mind has been: WTF?
So in saying this, only yesterday, did I finally decide...
Surrender = Contentment
I finally surrendered to 'nothingness' and allowed myself to completely immerse myself in the 'nothingness'... By putting the intention out there to have a day that was completely 'thought-less' and completely surrendered to the present moment...
And what came out this?
Well, even though no 'thoughts' came to mind, the actual result was that I was completely 'mind-full!'
I was completely in touch with the NOW, and my ACTUAL mind... the so-called 'BIGGER-MIND'... rather than that of the annoying little chatty-mind... that seriously never stops talking! Lol...
Well...not only did I finish one of my cleaning jobs in record time, but the energy I had after finishing (usually knackered) was boundless! I had so much energy, that when I got home after a 1.5hr. drive, I took me and Tyson (the beautiful greyhound I'm sitting) on a 15min. jog! This is crazy! And believe you me, never happens!
Tyson and I!
Not only that, but during my drive home and after the jog, in it came. The ideas! The breakthroughs! The realisations! The insights! It all came rushing in. One by one.
All because I surrendered.
Surrendered to my reality. Surrendered to the present moment. And to the reality of nothingness.
So here I am today. Writing my first blog in a while. Getting inspired like I've not been in a while. Full of ideas like I've not had for a while. With new visions. New possibilities. All coming to ahead.
So I guess those good old nuggets... trust and and surrender... have something to say for themselves.
Trusting that in those times, where nothing is happening, it may just be for a very good reason, in my case... this was to rest and calm the mind...
And surrendering. By surrendering into this space, this space of nothingness. And this present moment. May indeed allow that flow. That flow of your special gift, to once again, rise up, and enter your reality.
I'll still be taking it easy for the next while as I feel to sit with, explore and integrate my new visions. But I look very forward to sharing these with you in coming weeks/months... or when the Universe decides ;-)
Writer. Empowerment Mentor. Spiritual Guide for Sensitive Souls.
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